


queen of swords

by springty



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, Knight Gwen, Lancelot (Merlin) Lives, Merlin's Magic Revealed (Merlin), Minor Gwen/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), by which I mean they're together when this fic starts but this isn't an arwen fic, not to Arthur tho
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-17
Updated: 2020-08-26
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:22:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,991
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25948033
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/springty/pseuds/springty
Summary: men aren't the only ones who can fight, as gwen continued to prove. she was as capable as any of the knights, even if arthur only thought of her as someone for him to save. she was capable enough to be a knight, if women could be knights. after she saves their lives, arthur and the knights of the round table have a newfound appreciation for guinevere. lancelot's appreciations are renewed - if they had ever gone anywhere in the first place.
Relationships: Gwen/Lancelot (Merlin)
Comments: 1
Kudos: 5





	1. Chapter 1

Gwen didn’t make a habit of worrying after Arthur and his knights. They were all trained warriors who could defend themselves, and she reminded herself of that fact when she would sometimes begin to fret over Arthur or her brother. Merlin she worried about more often. He wasn’t a fighter like the rest of him, but Arthur still always dragged him along. Still, he’d been fine so far - though it was beyond Gwen how he’d managed. All in all, she tried not to worry too much and to have faith in them.

But when Arthur and the knights didn’t return from a routine patrol, she quickly grew concerned. They weren’t meant to have gone far, and it was a patrol they conducted all the time. But they were taking far longer than usual. Gwen knew something must not be right. They should have returned by now. Against her better judgement, she set out for them herself.

She put on a pair of trousers, got a sword, and set out on a borrowed horse. She knew it was risky going alone, but she had to go, and she didn’t know who to ask to accompany her. Were he not one of the people she was searching for, she would have asked Elyan. But she was on her own, and she only hoped she could find them soon.

When at last she came upon them, only Gwaine, Lancelot, and somehow Merlin were still on their feet, and facing down some large beast, the likes of which Gwen had never seen before in her life. She suspected it must be a magical creature, though she didn’t know for certain. She hoped and prayed that the others were unconscious at worst, and was relieved when she thought she saw Elyan move a bit. She knew she had to help them, knew she couldn’t waste time. She got down from her horse, drew her sword, and approached the creature from behind.

She saw Merlin, who was watching Lancelot and Gwaine face down the beast with terror in his eyes. Soon he noticed Gwen, but he didn’t seem to realize that Gwen noticed him as well. His expression shifted from fear to what almost looked like concentration. Just before she ran her sword through the creature from behind, Gwen saw his lips move and his eyes glow gold. _Merlin-?_

The beast collapsed, and Gwen withdrew her sword from its flesh. They all stared at her. Gwaine and Lancelot looked impressed, but Merlin looked distraught. She could have guessed why. 

“Guinevere,” Lancelot said breathlessly, staring at her. “I- thank you.” He thought, briefly, of how she continued to amaze him, how exceptional she was and he- but her heart belonged to Arthur.

Merlin already was tending to the others, who luckily were all still alive, though not without significant injuries. They set out to return to Camelot, where they could all be tended to by Gaius. They encountered on the way back a small gang of bandits, and Gwen helped the uninjured knights fend them off. Again she saw Lancelot staring, and she didn’t know how to feel.

Guinevere stayed in the physician’s chambers after they returned, keeping the wounded knights company. Leon and Elyan both had seen her kill the creature, despite being incapacitated themselves, and had seen her help dispatch the bandits. They were both grateful and impressed, though not surprised. They both remembered Gwen wielding a sword as well as either of them when they were children. Arthur, briefly, was resentful at having been saved by a girl. Everyone told him to shut up, he ought to be grateful. And he did. And, truthfully, he was. He simply hadn’t known that Gwen had it in her.

Gwen, meanwhile, couldn’t stop thinking about what she had seen. Merlin’s eyes, glowing like they were on fire. It was magic; it must have been. Merlin had magic. He was still Merlin, of course, still her friend, and she didn’t want this to change anything. But regardless, she had to speak to him about it.

She approached him. “Merlin?” He looked up. “May I speak with you? Uhm- privately?”

All of the color drained from Merlin’s face. _He knows that I know_ , Gwen thought. “Of course,” Merlin said hurriedly, and led her into his bedroom. He shut the door behind them and began rocking on his heels. Gwen understood why he was so frightened, but she wanted him to know that he didn’t need to be. “What is it?” he asked.

She took a deep breath and hesitated. She wasn’t sure how to say it. How did one approach this? “I- well-” She swallowed. “I… saw you use magic.”


	2. Chapter 2

“I… saw you use magic.”

Merlin stared at her, his fear mounting quickly. She knew. Gwen knew. What if she told Arthur? “I- I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he choked out, and it was so obviously a lie.

“Merlin, I saw you.” Her voice was gentle, but he was unable to relax. “I’m not going to tell anyone. I just wanted…” She wasn’t entirely sure what she had wanted. “I wanted you to know that I know. That you don’t have to hide it from me any longer.”

He exhaled. He was relieved, though he should not have been surprised. It was Gwen. He was grateful that his secret was safe with her, though he still felt like a fool for not being more careful in the first place. If Gwen had seen him, then who else? He tried not to worry about it too much, but the concern that some of the knights might have seen still swarmed in his mind. “I… thank you,” he said eventually.

“Of course.” She hesitated. “I do have a question.”

He tensed up a bit. “Yes?”

“Who else knows?”

“Gaius and Lancelot.” He hoped that was all.

Gwen nodded. “Alright.” Without a second thought, she pulled Merlin into a hug. Though there were still plenty of people Merlin had to hide his magic from, Gwen knowing felt like a weight off his shoulders.

  
Arthur and the knights all, luckily, made smooth and swift recoveries. When they were both feeling like themselves again, Sir Leon decided to speak with his prince about something that had been on his mind during his recovery. He knocked on the door to Arthur’s chambers, and walked inside when Arthur called, “come in!”  
He bowed his head, as always. “Sire.”

Arthur looked at him from where he sat. “Sir Leon. Is everything alright?”

He nodded. “Yes, my lord. I simply wanted to speak with you.”

“What about?”

“Guinevere.”

“Guinevere??” Leon saw concern rising on his prince’s face. “Is she alright?”

“She is perfectly well, sire,” he assured him. “I mean to say, I wanted to speak with you about what she did for us.”  
Arthur frowned slightly. “What do you mean?”

“Slaying that beast and saving us, sire,” he said, looking as though it were obvious, and the prince rolled his eyes.

“Gwaine and Lancelot had it under control, Leon. I did not need saving.”

Leon did not tell Arthur that he didn’t believe him, even though he certainly did not, because a knight was not meant to say such things to his prince. Not outright, anyway. “Be that as it may, sire,” he continued, in a tone that conveyed his true thoughts well enough, “what she did was very impressive.” Again, the prince - the reigning king, what with Uther’s condition - rolled his eyes. Leon, accustomed to such behaviors, went on undeterred. “Many of the other knights are in agreement, my lord. Lancelot seemed especially impressed with her.”

“Well, he would be,” Arthur snapped. The knight blinked, taken aback. “She walks into a room and he’s impressed with her.” Leon thought he detected jealousy in Arthur’s voice, though he couldn’t comprehend why; Gwen was with him, not Lancelot.

He chose to ignore it, continuing on. “She helped fight those bandits, as well. She is excellent with a sword.”

“Leon, do you have a point with all this?”

“Oh, uh- yes, my lord.” Arthur gestured for him to continue. “I know that you’re always looking for competent men, to be knights. There are so few who measure up.”

“What’s that got to do with Guinevere?” Leon suppressed a laugh. His prince was many things, but clever was not typically one of them.

“Well, sire, I was wondering if you would be open to the idea of knighting a competent woman instead.”

When the understanding dawned on Arthur, he scoffed. “Women can’t be knights.”

“All due respect, my lord, but I once said that to her as children and she hit me over the head with a wooden sword.” He could still remember telling Gwen that she couldn’t play knights with him and Elyan because she was a girl, and the bump on his head that had earned him. Gwen always got to play knights after that.

“Well, we’re not children anymore, Sir Leon. Women cannot be knights.”

“Neither can men of common birth,” Leon responded.

Arthur didn’t have a good response. “Well…”

“If you give her the opportunity to prove herself to you, my lord, I am certain that she will.”

“...I’ll think about it,” Arthur conceded, waving him away.

Leon bowed his head. “Very well, sire.” And he left the room.


	3. Chapter 3

Arthur was embarrassed by how easily he ended up caving to Leon’s suggestion. He asked Merlin what he thought of the idea and had received a strong endorsement. And, though he would never admit it, Arthur did value his manservant’s input on occasion. When he actually asked for it, not when Merlin gave it unprompted.  
Before Arthur knew it, Guinevere was attending training sessions with all of the other future knight hopefuls. A woman, and a serving girl no less, was not universally well received at training. On her first day, she received a number of dirty looks and unkind comments for her presence. The next day Arthur told the men not to give her any more trouble, and told Gwen to tell him if any of them did. Plenty of the men were apparently unbothered by Arthur’s order, but Gwen didn’t take it up with the prince. She could handle it herself.

It soon became apparent that Gwen was capable of putting to shame with a sword many of the other trainees who strove to make her feel unwelcome, and in doing so earned the respect of a few who had initially doubted her. Although Arthur had allowed her this, he still found himself surprised. Perhaps he didn’t know Guinevere as well as he had thought, if he didn’t know she would be such a quick learner and a skilled swordswoman. No one else - Merlin, Leon, Elyan,  _ Lancelot _ \- seemed as surprised as he was. He wasn’t sure why that bothered him so much.

What Arthur’s friends were, however, was incredibly supportive of Gwen. Merlin watched her train with a fond expression and a bright smile on his face. He would grin and even clap whenever she beat a sparring partner, and she would sometimes flash him a smile and wave in return. If it were anyone else, Arthur likely would have been bothered by it. With Merlin, though, he didn’t have it in him to be jealous. Merlin and Gwen had been close friends for years, and Arthur recently figured out that Merlin’s affections lie elsewhere. Why Merlin was interested in Gwaine, of all people, Arthur wasn’t sure, but at least he didn’t have anything to worry about when it came to him and Gwen. What troubled Arthur was Lancelot. He was always staring after Gwen during training, looking so hopelessly _lovestruck._ _  
_ And Arthur wasn’t jealous. He wasn’t. What did he have to be jealous of? Guinevere loved him. She had chosen him over Lancelot. Except… had she? Lancelot had stepped back and let Arthur have her, because he was so ridiculously selfless and of course he had, but from the way he still looked at her Arthur wondered if the knight didn’t have regrets. If maybe he wished, for once, to be selfish. And what would Guinevere say if he did? Arthur liked to imagine that she would turn Lancelot, noble, charming Lancelot down; that she would still choose him. But he didn’t know for certain.  


It soon came time for Gwen’s final test. Merlin and the knights gathered to watch as she faced off against Arthur. Merlin gave her thumbs up, grinning, right before her time started. He stood between Gwaine and Lancelot, watching in anticipation. It quickly became clear that Arthur wasn’t holding back because of who he was facing, though Gwen didn’t exactly give him the option to with how well she fought. When she briefly stumbled, Merlin and Lancelot both grimaced, but she regained her footing easily. Leon’s gaze flickered to the hourglass; already the time had nearly run out. When he looked back, however, he watched Gwen knock the prince to the ground. She pointed her sword at his chest and took off her helmet, looking incredibly proud of herself - as she had every right to be. Lancelot was staring.

She extended a hand, helping Arthur onto his feet. He was embarrassed to have lost, but impressed and pleased with her nonetheless. He took off his own helmet and smiled a bit, in spite of himself. “Congratulations, Guinevere.”

  
  



	4. Chapter 4

“Arise, Dame Guinevere, Knight of Camelot.”

Gwen couldn’t help smiling as Arthur said the words, gazing up at him. She stood when he instructed her to. Arthur placed a hand on her shoulder, smiling. “Congratulations.”

“Thank you, my lord.”

Lancelot was watching her, the fondest expression on his face. As Arthur leaned in to kiss her, she accidentally caught his gaze. She tried not to think of it as she felt Arthur’s lips on hers.

When she began accompanying the other knights on patrols, Gwen realized just how often Lancelot looked at her with that expression. Even after he had left for her to be with Arthur, it seemed his feelings had not changed. But when Guinevere caught him looking at her - and he often was, and he looked at her like she had hung the stars in the sky - he looked away. She wished he would say whatever he felt outright. She wished that, if he still harbored affection for her, he would tell her so.

She knew why he didn’t, of course. It was because of Arthur. In Lancelot’s mind, Gwen had chosen Arthur. But Lancelot had not given her the opportunity to decide otherwise. In doing what he had thought was right, in trying to be _selfless_ , he had completely neglected how she might feel. But if he had let her make her own choice… well, if he had, they might be doing more than stealing glances at each other on patrol.

The thought filled her with guilt, as did most of her thoughts of Lancelot. Often, too often, she thought of what she would have done if he had stayed. Would she still be with Arthur? Or if Lancelot got tired of only longing stares, and finally approached her - what then? She hated the fact that she couldn’t say for sure. And it wasn’t that she didn’t care for Arthur; she did, and a great deal. But Lancelot was different, even if she couldn’t quite say how or why.

Sometimes, she remembered a past exchanging of words between her and Lancelot, something she had once said to him. _As long as I live, my feelings for you will never fade._ She had meant it when she said it. Was it true? She knew in her heart that if it was, she had no business still being with Arthur.

Lancelot slowly began speaking to her more often. He never dared venture outside the realm of friendship, of course. But even when the things he said weren’t openly romantic, Gwen still felt as if they were. She had forgotten the way that Lancelot could make her feel. And he was always so incredibly kind, and he always seemed to understand her in a way that Arthur couldn’t quite. And when he smiled at her - and he had a _beautiful_ smile - Gwen felt even more wracked with guilt.

The moment of truth for Gwen came when Arthur had kissed her and she closed her eyes and found herself thinking of someone else. She knew that she couldn’t keep doing this. It wasn’t fair to Arthur. Gently, she pushed him away, and he looked confused.

She took a deep breath. “Arthur, I…” How did one go about rejecting their prince? “I can’t do this anymore. I’m so sorry.”

He stared at her. “You… what?”

“It’s not your fault. I swear it isn’t. I wish I didn’t have to do this.”

“I understand.” He didn’t, not really. But Guinevere seemed remorseful enough as is, and he didn’t want her to think him angry with her for this. And then, because he couldn’t help himself, he asked, “Who is it?” They were happy - or at least he had thought. She must have found someone else.

“What?”

“There’s someone else, isn’t there? Who is it?”

She bit her lip; she looked almost frightened to admit it. “Lancelot,” she said quietly.

“Lancelot,” Arthur repeated. Everything he had thought about Gwen and the knight was now confirmed. “I should have known.”  
“Arthur, I’m sorry,” she said, and he wished she wouldn’t apologize. “Nothing happened between him and I while I’ve been with you, I swear.”

He believed that, at least. He didn’t think, even now, that she could ever do that to him. “It’s fine.” It didn’t feel fine. It didn’t feel fine at all. But he would not say such things to her.

“I-”

He shook his head and held up a hand. “Guinevere.” His voice wavered far more than he would have liked. “It’s fine.” He didn’t know who he was trying to convince.


End file.
